Fisher Watkins Funeral Home Danville Virginia Obituaries

Death and Taxes: The Laughable Life of Danville's Fisher Watkins Funeral Home

Alright, gather 'round, folks. I've got a tale to spin about a place that's as much a part of life as taxes and, well, death. I'm talking about the one and only Fisher Watkins Funeral Home in Danville, Virginia. Now, don't go rolling your eyes, this isn't some morbid sob story. No, no, we're talking laughs, folks. Black humor, if you will.

Meet the Fisher Family: The Original Comedy Troupe

Let's set the stage, shall we? Picture this: Danville, Virginia, late 1800s. Along comes a fella named James Fisher. Now, James wasn't your average Joe. No, sir. He was a mortician, a coffin maker, and, as we'll soon find out, a bit of a comedian. He started his little enterprise, and thus, the Fisher Watkins Funeral Home was born.

Now, James had a wife, Martha, who was as sweet as apple pie. She was the yin to his yang, the straight man to his joke. And their kids? Well, they were the punchline. The Fishers were a comedy troupe, and their stage was Danville.

Coffins That Could Make a Mummy Laugh

James was known far and wide for his, shall we say, unique sense of humor. He'd carve little jokes into the coffins he made. "Here lies Johnny, he sure could play the fiddle... but now he's in a box, can't play a thing!" That sort of thing. The townsfolk would chuckle, shake their heads, and say, "That's James for you."

And the caskets themselves? Oh, they were a sight. James would paint them in the brightest colors, with the silliest designs. He once made a coffin that looked like a giant watermelon. Now, that's a send-off!

Watkins: The Straight Man Who Stole the Show

Now, along comes Ephraim Watkins. He was a serious sort, a man of few words. He married James' daughter, Elizabeth, and joined the family business. He was the straight man to James' comedic genius. But Ephraim had a secret. He had a dry wit that could cut through butter.

One day, a grieving widow came in, wanting the most expensive coffin they had. Ephraim, without missing a beat, said, "Ma'am, for that price, we can throw in a lifetime supply of tissues. You're gonna need 'em." The widow burst out laughing, and Ephraim sold the coffin. That was our Ephraim.

Obituaries: The Original Reality TV

Now, let's talk about those obituaries. The Fisher Watkins Funeral Home obituaries were legendary. They were like the original reality TV, folks. James and Ephraim would write them, and they were anything but dull.

Take old Mabel Thompson, for instance. Her obit read, "Mabel passed away peacefully in her sleep last night. The family is grateful for the peaceful passing, as Mabel was known to snore loud enough to wake the dead." Now, that's a eulogy!

The Legacy Lives On

Today, the Fisher Watkins Funeral Home is still standing, still serving Danville. The humor has toned down a bit, but the spirit lives on. The current owner, Henry Fisher, James' great-great-grandson, says, "We might not paint coffins like watermelons anymore, but we still try to bring a smile to people's faces. That's our legacy."

So, there you have it, folks. The Fisher Watkins Funeral Home: where death meets comedy. Next time you're in Danville, Virginia, give 'em a visit. Just don't be surprised if you find yourself laughing at the most unexpected time.