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Allegheny County Court Of Common Pleas Judges


Allegheny County Court Of Common Pleas Judges

Alright, gather 'round, folks. I've got a tale to tell about the Allegheny County Court of Common Pleas Judges. Now, don't go falling asleep on me, it's not your average courtroom drama. We've got humor, we've got heart, and we've even got a judge who's a bit of a foodie. So, buckle up!

Meet the Judges: A Cast of Characters

First things first, let's meet our judges. Now, I'm not saying they're as colorful as a box of crayons, but they're not exactly a bunch of wallflowers either. We've got Judge Goldsmith, who's got more puns up his sleeve than a magician at a kids' party. Then there's Judge McVay, who's so tech-savvy, she makes me look like a Neanderthal. And let's not forget Judge Wettick, who's got more legal experience than a law book has pages.

But the real MVP of the Allegheny County Court of Common Pleas Judges? That's Judge Dougherty. Why, you ask? Because he's a man who knows his priorities. He's been known to adjourn court for a good old-fashioned Pittsburgh pierogi festival. I mean, who needs justice when you can have pierogies, right?

Surprising Facts: Because You Thought You Knew Everything

Now, I know what you're thinking. "Judges? Boring! They just sit there, looking all serious and important." Well, let me burst your bubble with some surprising facts. Did you know that Judge McVay once ruled on a case involving a pet ferret? That's right, folks. In Allegheny County, we don't just deal with the big stuff. We've got ferret fever!

And how about this one? Judge Wettick once presided over a case where a man claimed he was possessed by a demon. I know, I know, it sounds like something out of a horror movie. But hey, when you're dealing with the law, you never know what's going to walk through those courtroom doors.

Three Black women are among Allegheny County’s newly-elected judges
Three Black women are among Allegheny County’s newly-elected judges

Judges: The Original Social Media Influencers

Alright, alright, I can hear you laughing from here. "Judges on social media? Yeah, right!" Well, hold onto your hats, because Judge Goldsmith is a Twitter sensation. Okay, maybe not a sensation, but he does have a following. And why not? The man's got a way with words. He once tweeted, "I've presided over cases involving everything from murder to parking tickets. But I've never had to rule on a case involving a pet ferret... until today." I mean, come on. That's comedy gold!

The Courtroom: Where Laughter Meets Justice

Now, I know what you're thinking. "This all sounds great, but what about the serious stuff? The law and all that jazz?" Well, folks, let me tell you, these judges take their jobs seriously. But that doesn't mean they can't have a little fun while they're at it. Judge Dougherty once dismissed a case with the words, "I dismiss this case with prejudice... and a side of fries." I mean, who says the law can't be delicious?

How did Officer Hall die?: Secret justice can never be justice
How did Officer Hall die?: Secret justice can never be justice

And let's not forget the time Judge Goldsmith ruled on a case involving a man who claimed he was too attractive to be guilty. I kid you not. The judge's response? "I find that your good looks are no defense to the charges against you." Boom. Mic drop.

In Conclusion: Judges, They're Just Like Us!

So there you have it, folks. The Allegheny County Court of Common Pleas Judges: a cast of characters who are as entertaining as they are justice-serving. They're proof that even in the most serious of places, a little laughter can go a long way. And who knows? Maybe next time you're in court, you'll see a judge tweeting from the bench. Stranger things have happened, right?

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